Main Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Topics - Rising Spirit

Greetings all, I'd really like to begin a qualitative discussion about what might be considered the five key stages of the 5-MeO-DMT experience.  Obviously, one could feasibly imagine hundreds if not thousands of stages of consciousness, with an interphase with a molecule of this force, majesty and immensity.  But I humbly believe that much of these nearly infinite, possibilities in cognitive awareness can be universally encapsulated into a reasonable, finite number and besides...  I honestly couldn't resist the numeric reference to the 5 medicine.  Everyone would likely reason them to their own preferences and name them accordingly. I humbly feel that these are the 5 primary stages that occur to the 5 pilgrim:

#1. Anointment through Ceremony.  #2. Surrender & Absorption.  #3. Union & Attunement with Source.  #4. Re-crystallization & Rebirth.  #5. Healing & Integration.

Arguably, this is a gross simplification and could certainly be expanded further.  And please, I welcome any and all comments or contributions to this discussion, as ideally it is a conversation.  One with input from other psychonautical travelers within this family.  Feel free to share your ideas.   

While it only seems to have relevance on this side of the looking glass, where one can interpret reality subjectively, there exists a profound degree of what I call, "the remembrance" by all who boldly journey with the 5 sacrament. Perhaps we could view the 5-MeO experience as a perceptual voyage beyond the membrane dividing the inside and the outside, the substantial and the insubstantial, the cause and the personal effect of being both the source and the reflection of what I personally label as, The Divine.  That eternal no-thingness pulsing within all that becomes something.  More so, it is my belief, in the hindsight of my 12 experiences with this medicine, paradox is present both during the culmination and the re-entry phase of the trip. 

Said paradox creates a most unusual and unique experiential pendulum of sorts, as when the individual soul enters the realm of the nondual, boundaryless expanse of undifferentiated, blinding white light energy, all personal thought ceases to exist.   There is an alignment that happens. I  label this as, "the eclipsing" for as a massive force of expanssive energy rushes through us, temporarily shattering our unique cocoons of self mesmerism, all individuation effectively dissipates.  This then, in effect, blocks out our experience of being a separate part, independent of the whole totality of life.  Our mortal vantage point is temporarily obliterated, totally frozen and unreachable...  or is it merely suspended? 

Now regardless of this self-stasis, there is maintained on one level or another, an epicentrical core presence.  I theorize that this absolute Source energy,  weaves a cosmic tapestry, spontaneously fueling the dichotomy of manifested being and the sheerest void of non-being.  And is wholly indivisible, ineffible, unquantifiable and the sum total of the mysterious Omniverse, just doing it's thing. Dissolving into a such a vortexial fulcrum consumes all of our personal reference points and even the palpable identification with our very own sense of self.  Empty, unmoving silence sits quietly, deep within the ringing vibration of each birthing human soul bird, who reaches out fearlessly, uttering voice and taking spiritual flight within the neon effulgence...  the supreme light of all lights.  Much as the proverbial, "moth to the flame".

So, in light of these paradoxical fluctuations in subjectification, each of us recrystallizes right back into finite, three dimensional existence. Yet, are we returned the same as before the intrepid voyage was initiated?  Hardly.  Much reflection and integration are required to find balance and proper buoyancy within consensus reality and the delicate interplay between oneself and others.  I have myself, felt a far stronger bond with all living things.  It's certainly a rebirthing process, which can be both a blessing and sometimes a curse.  How so?  I can only testify as to my own 12 journeys, but within the timeless, directionless vacuum of the peak moments, an almost indescribable bliss is present and an awareness of love as a unitive field.  Coming down from such heights can be most daunting.  Even heartbreaking, in some not so subtle ways. 

Who is it that knows such euphoric ecstasy?  Again, the ultimate paradox presents itself loud and clear.  Without awareness of an ego, self referencing or even self orientation...  who/what/where is it that resides in such resplendent freedom, radiating an absolutely undiluted state of universality? Naturally, out of this formless Omniscience, pours myriad streams of life, sacred geometries and an infinite potential of substantiation, creation and eventual dissolution.

Might we exchange thoughts about this kind blowing and transformative sacred medicine and it's profound impact in our lives?  Many thanks! 
Aho, Namaste and Namaskar.    _/|\_  _/|\_         
Spirituality / Medicine & Mysticism
September 10, 2023, 10:29:19 PM
In regards to the tremendous shift in one's consciousness brought about by ceremony with the sacred 5 molecule, I humbly submit that any attempt to articulate the dissolution of one's ordinary modality of self mesmerizm, is effectively shattered into so much cosmic dust. It might be speculative on my part, but when one's illusions are washed away with such potent force...  who then remains to maintain any iota of cognitive, subjective attention?  I'd add that during every single one of my nondual epiphanies, there occurs a certain degree of total white out.  What happens is not exactly a completely blank canvas, dead voidness, nor a state of helpless comatose.  Rather, without thought process or identity through self-orientation, by what measure does one fathom the unfathomable?  It would be sheer insanity to proclaim that without rational thought, premeditated determination or habitual intention, for any strata of self awareness to survive the wholly dissolving fulcrum of attunement to pure Source omniscience, that the 5 medicine reliably gifts.

What does come through so beautifully and so divinely intended, is that while during the full-eclipsing with the sacred white vacuum of limitless infinity, that insubstancial, yet magnificently effulgent power, there is both soul recognition and deep spiritual resonance. I call it the remembrance.  Minds are frozen by the overwhelming and unbridled force of the 5 molecule. Identification with our accustomed storylines are essentially, temporarily erased yet, something mysteriously wonderful still pulses sublimely, without name, dimension nor any form.  A profound symbiosis occurs to those accustomed to long periods of time without fixation upon thoughts and one's internal dialog.  This is primarily why I so enthusiastically emphasize the magical practice of daily sitting and moving meditation.  Existence is relative to one's mindset and to the programmed patterning of our unique, experientially learned behavior.  Freeze that pattern and conscious-awareness still resides and perception, while it may lack perceivable orientation, voyages on through our willing surrender of control and habitual need for finite quantification...  but still maintains buoyancy through the miracle of focussed attention.

Ultimately, I surmise that in such a buoyant ego stasis, one erasing of self projection and maintenance of concrete reality, a most lovely state of attunement and receptivity blooms.  Within such a vortexial fulcrum of no-thingness...  what appears to be absolute emptiness is essentially a force of limitless potentiality, a beginningless and endless recycling of becoming and in turn, dissolving into sheerest oblivion.  Such is the dualistic nature of 3 dimensional, material existence, as it is birthed, rippens and eventually dissipates back into undifferentiated formlessness. What does remain if everything is so utterly transient?  I hypothesize that pure Source energy resides within all strata of phenomenal occurrences and all degrees of existential being.  Call it the Godhead or the eternal Tao or the Great Spirit...  yet it matters little.  What does emphatically matter, is attunement to this Source energy and a remembrance of always having been indivisibly one with this miraculous field of absolute potentiality, endlessly blooming, ad infinitum.

And then...  out sheerest emptiness explodes luminosity beyond description.  Let there be Light!  There was an overwhelmingly immense, blinding illumination and radiance..  Flooding, cascading, revitalizing effulgence emerges to bring a spark and enlightening vibration of intuitive understanding and then, divine transmission awakens the soul bird to take immortal flight.  Herein, is the sacred treasure, the very kernel of philosophy and of all religions.  As Hermes Trismegistus said so profoundly, nearly 3000 years ago, "As above, so bellow.  As within, so without.  As the universe, so the soul."  Unity is the only law which endures.  We are one and I honor you all with fierce yet loving reverence.  Aho, Namaste and Namaskar.    _/|\_  _/|\_

The very first time that I smoked 5-MeO-DMT was just over five years ago.  Within seconds...  I experienced falling forwards into an immense void.  My capacity for any subjective perception dissolved into the sheerest emptiness imaginable.  Just moments before all differentiations whited-out, I was certain that I had killed myself.  Then all strata of reality became a silent, insubstantial vacuum of sorts, absorbing and erasing any iota of separation. 

Were there a self witnessing the dissolution, it might have been rather terrifying but all distinction betwixt the inside and the outside had vanished.  All there was, as I later recalled, was this boundaryless, directionless,  no-thingness.  It wasn't all inky blackness nor a blinding luminosity.  It was totally unknown and unknowable, ineffible yet all-pervasive.  This zero point is impossible to describe, naturally, as it is wholly nondual.  Yet, being a monkey...  I must chatter all about what cannot even be feasibly spoken of, nor ever put into language.   Lol. 🐒

I can't say how long this was an endlessly, beginningless, looping continuum...  as I was technically not even there.  Perhaps there is an absolute wealth of unborn potentiation, silently gestating within it's limitless formlessness?  That said and upon further remembrance, after what seemed an infinite degree of silence, a vibration began to be felt.  An oscillation ignited this epic cross friction.  An urge to exist, to be, to experience conscious-awareness incrementally seeded itself as a dawning realization of a dichotomy, a dynamic of self orientation re-crystallized. 

The vibration increased until is was distinctly audible.  But to whom?  The indivisibility of the nondual field began to divide and be divided into individualized cognition and a knowledge of existing.  That which perceives, became aware of that which is perceived.  The unborn was born anew and a powerful desire to exist began to pulse with increased urgency.  The "I" that had dissolved so quickly, re-coalesced into some kind of ancient, yet infantile urge to become.  To be rebirthed into duality. 

But why?  I don't suppose anyone will ever know.  Then there was suddenly a blinding white light exploding from everywhere and from no where.  "Let there be Light!".  Said luminosity manifested some kind of mirrored interplay between the Light itself and the witness to the effulgence.   The auditory vibration pulsed in sync with the rest of the boudaryless light field.  It hummed and crackled, echoing this roaring force, emanating from some unfathomable quietude. 

The newly reborn composite, I/me/myself, that became an individuated vortexial fulcrum, began tearing up.  I had been reborn, separate from the Oneness but deeply in love with the divinity of the whole.  Ego-self wept from the pain of the separation but delighted in the sincere worship of the Godhead.  I suspect that I was in such pure ecstasy for some good measure of time! 

I seemed to recall desiring to become.  Longing to love and be loved in return.  I was both the subject and the object, entwined in some cosmic, mysterious dance.  An understanding of my need to become sentient, bloomed from deeply inside of a mortal heart.  I had remembered now just why I had chosen to be born.  An immense need to create dimensionality resided within the universal pulse which was echoed in the beating of a human heart.  With every heartbeat, a dreaming self declared it's existential being.  I am.  I exist.  But do I really?  How can one be both, the Source and the reflection? 

A sudden remembrance popped up within the fabric of my mind, of having always being at the epicenter of all paradigms all at once and also, of being every little particle and photon riding the waves further away from the unbroken Omniscience...  thus, manifesting an eternity in the making.  Gratitude replaced the blissfulness of indivisibility and a tremendous feeling of wanting to do good service to all other dreaming selves.  I thank you all for arriving here, now.  Together we must heal ourselves and each other.   If love is the buzz and I believe that it surely is...  I emphatically love you all and fiercely so!  Aho, Namaste and Namaskar.

A wonderful new form of 5-MeO-DMT has allegedly been created and this ushers in an ingestible form of the sacrement, 4-HO-5-MeO-DMT.  It is produced by introducing 5-MeO to pscilocybe cubensis mushrooms, although the 5 is wholly predominant  What a beautiful synthesis!  I've yet to be anointed but it is very exciting news.  Some really good folks had created a church and support network for it's members.  I just wanted to  share the info with you all.  Their website is: [Redacted because we don't source on this forum]   _/|\_ _/|\_
Greetings all.  From my view of things, the most powerful teaching that Sacred Medicines gift is the temporary erasure of our conditioned ego-referencing.  Perhaps one might see this as the brief cessation of the isolated, finite self?  Certainly all beings experience this during deep sleep and unconsciousness.  Yet, the way that psychedelics dissolve the solidity of individuality is most remarkable, as it is a wholly conscious realignment.  Conscious of exactly what?  My humble belief is that the psychonaut becomes conscious of primordial conscious-awareness itself.  Call it:  Brahman, the Godhead, Christ or the Eternal Tao but it remains free of any and all rational quantification.  As such, it's the unique type of awareness that is wholly epicentrical, multi-dimensional and even multi- directional.  This doesn't allow for subjective perception, per se, for such a deep remembrance tosses all associations with ordinary perception into sheer oblivion. 

Some might emphatically argue that there is no different between deep sleep and Samadhi states...  from my windowsill, the distinct difference is that while asleep or dreaming, everything is obscured by an acute absence of all capacity of any conceivable degree of control over one's own awareness and it's direction.  By stark contrast, while in full-blown eclipsing of the peak moments of an entheogenic compound, a far greater sense of existential being is then programmed of perhaps even, imprinted?  Which is quite a topical catch word these days. Anyhooo... I do still say "imprinted" as the process requires no thought nor conceptualization and is dynamically interactive.  That comes later on, after touching down to earth as a kind of sacred remembrance.  Deeply rooted in the formlessness of the Source, mortal cognition abandons all boundaries and divisions betwixt this and that, yours and mine and such a state of being even shatters our cherished separation from God, through the duality of our collective, mortal religious worship. 

So the notion of oblivion arose in my thoughts today.  Of what special significance is the Medicine Journey oriented?  Through much reflection and intentional grounding, a message comes to the forefront and that is the message of Unity perceived within diversity.  Whether bathing within the bliss of spiritual Satori or suffering from the painful struggling which the isolated self believes is "reality"...  I have come to resonate with an understanding that the subtlest and truest nature of primary existence is essentially indivisible in nature and while it cannot possibly be known as an objectively concrete thing, it surely magikally creates, contains and re-absorbs all strata of this grand tapestry of life, recycling the energy and inertia back into an indivisible whole.  IME, 5-MeO-DMT reveals this shining truth with more power and limitless love, that any other known of molecule encountered by those who journey.   

I welcome any and all comments.  Wishing you each illumination on your intrepid journey home!  Namaste all.   _/|\_ _/|\_

Part Two.
(An attempt to quantify)

During my most recent and least obliterating of intrepid spirit journeys with 5, the subjective perception of my witnessing self remained intact for perhaps 85% of the psychedelic voyage.  This was due in part to my growing familiarity with the whole chemical bloom of the experience and more so, the amount of synthesized sacrement vaporized.  My last remaining bit from a 114 mg packet.  A gift from a beautiful soul.  It was likely to be approx. 5+ mg?  It was slightest volume I have ever consumed, in stark contrast to the previous journey, a classic whiteout experience.  In summation, the prior voyage was most self-erasing.  Not a blackout experience at all...  but something that takes conscious-awareness into an altogether different paradigmn, an infinite expansion of blinding light.  Such high energy shifts in perceptual dimensionality, literally vibrate the subjectivity right out of oneself (or is it deeper into one's self, to the very epicentrical core of being?).  Upon this recent, far milder voyage, I took careful notice of the series of the progressing stages of the trip.  I was accutely focussed on mapping out some of the primary attributes of such a nondual, transcendental experience.

As I am accustomed to do, I begin each DMT journey with the adequate amount of stretching, Hatha yoga and pranayama included.  I sit in deep meditation for 20 to 30 minutes and try to loosen myself up as much as I am able to, bodily, mentally and emotionally.  I clear the area carefully of potentially harmful objects and surround myself with blankets and pillows.  I always start such explossive experiences, mindfully sitting upright in a lotus posture.  Most of the time I end up either flat out on my back or I fall forwards onto my face and leave the material body helpless but safely here on Terra Firma, while meanwhile, I dissolve into the vortexial fulcrum of the omniscience of the eternal spirit.  Rarely can I maintain an upright sitting or standing posture with either DMT or 5-MeO-DMT.  This time, however, I maintained the padmasana through the entirety of the trip, holding space in a most attentive and deeply reverentialy way.   _/|\_ _/|\_

In terms of an almost immediate effect, was the awareness of an ever-increasing ringing tonality, whose intrinsic vibration creates multiples of sympathetic tonal harmonies, echoing endlessly, all combined to produce a symphony of ascending harmonics.  This is much like the ringing chime of an Asian brass gong being struck (yet with no beginning, nor any seeming cessation) and the tonal vibration acts an emissary sorts, echoing a frequency of sonics more powerful in such moments, than even galexies exploding into being.  It always sounds so conscious and ALIVE...  as if the ethereal ringing tonality was singing praises to the whole universe, echoing the voice of our Omniversal source.  The vibrating rings of energy cascaded throughout my mind and shattered my fixation with the mere surface of material life.  They all issue from a single, higher resonance tone and appear to mimic the supremacy of the single overtone.  Said "overtone" acts as a carrier wave and so, magnetically pulls one's rapt attention higher and deeper into the core source of the sonic vibratory field. 

Both N,N-DMT and 5-MeO-DMT share this higher tonality, oscillating fantastically, accompanied by the vertically sky-rocketing ride the pilgrim embarks upon.  The 5 sacrement seems less sharp and more serenity-evoking, if that makes any sense?  I always allow myself to travel consciously into the pulsations of the tonal ringing.  In conjunction with the sonic phenomena, there are intricate fractals weaving patterns in curved, aching geometric plumes.  While my voyages with this sacrement appear largely monochromatic, I noted the interplay of violet and teal-green refractions edging the intricately white lines forming the fractals within the inky darkness.  Each gentle pattern interlaced into a larger designs, melting incrementally into a ceiling of incomprehensible neon-brightness, whose clear and sparkling luminosity bespoke of the great effulgence, pulsing beyond this fragile mortal paradigmn.

There was a palpable building up of the Kundalini sleeping dormantly inside of my human physiology.  This 12th voyage with 5-MeO was astoundingly, yet unsurprisingly, exactly like a classical yogic description of the awakening of the Serpent Energy.  So much so, that I felt each ascending chakra ignite and fully activate, as the energy expanded by degree after degree.  The rise in energies was in total sync with the arching fractal weaving.  While quite less psychedelic and kaleidoscopic than with DMT or very high doses of LSD-25, the visions were softer edged, more lacey and extremely lovely.  They were projected over an inky blackness and above the arching wings of the personal witness, shone pulsations of laser beams, fractals of neon white light.  They were rays of effulgence that created an inverted pyramid of sorts.  These Jacob's ladder-like beams interlocked with corresponding pyramidal rays of energy rising up from beneath my bodily frame.  It appeared as if it arose from the very epicentrical core point of this entire planet.  The dual forces crystallized and coalesced as one clearly formed pattern.  Like the Star of David but multidimensional in scope. The center of this Star of David eclipsing with point blank within the focus of the Ajna chakra, the 3rd eye or...   singular eye. 

While the visual elements came so quickly, the sonic elements continued as the geyser-like rush of energy exploded into full bloom, which expanded into the entirety of my crown, as if the cosmos had opened an attic door into the Absolute.  And as the higher regions of my mind interphased with the full bloom of the Sahasrara chakra, the effulgence churning from higher fields of dimensionality ever entranced my internal observations. 

Naturally, my soul wished to go into a full whiteout eclipsing but I was content to float arms length above my material head, ecstatically fused with the indivisibility of The Light of God.  I was a holographic projection of the luminosity.  We all are always, however, the mesmerizm of our physical senses and the power of the mental ego, with it's penchant for dualism, keep us asleep and dreaming.  For a brief eternity, the "I" becomes translucent.  It shifts from a separate point of personal division, into a multidirectional vortex of a seeming infinity of selves.  The I becomes the Eye, if you will and there is this dawning realization that we are all the same indivisible being, The Omniself.  One unified field, a singular force, beating within all hearts, yet, free in limitless resplendence. 

From such a nondual epiphany, one's entire dream of being an isolated self, an independent part of the story is an utter illusion.  Whose mesmerizm is this anyway?  There is naught but the One, so without the divided mind of subjective perception, there exist a clarity and stillness, one far beyond any and all human thought forms.  Then at the perfect moment, Amrita floods from above and cascades into the vessel of the soul. This always nurtures the traveler's, mind's-heart, with the nectar of immortality and from such a state of spiritual reflection, the boundaries are effectively erased by the enlightenment of the underlying unity.  Tears flow from the corners of the eyes and Amrita trickles down the throat in ecstatic spurts.  I cannot honestly say if ordinary rates of breathing are actually happening, in such pivotal moments...  but if they are, it is ever so subtle a respiratory cycle.  Gratitude then follows, humility and a desire to be a much better person.  I am convinced that such an awakening has great value in increasing our compassion and empathy for others.  After all, when the lines disappear and the divisions dissolve within the pulsation of the great white light, The Source reveals itself in the most loving yet terrifyingly of ways, literally devouring our mortal limitations. 

A few weeks of grounding and integrating has done wonders for my outlook on life.  I am greatly humbled and so thankful.  Peace, love and much light to you all, my fearless friends.  Om Shanti.   <3 <3
Part One.
(No possible translation)

I have been awaiting the muse to share my last two 5 experiences with you fine people.  Partly because the mind shattering whiteout experience that happened late last July, my 11th spirit journey with 5-MeO-DMT, was effectively beyond any dualistic reporting and also, there was an immense need to ground and integrate such a powerful shift in perceptual dimensionality.  Finding buoyancy, if you will?  15 mg was by far the largest volume of the 5 sacrement that I had ever imbibed (vaped).  KABOOM...  and gone.

Perceptually, it was largely self-erasing, overwhelming and most identity-dissolving.  So much so, that my entire reference point for what I believe is my innermost state of conscious witnessing, had experientially vanished wholly within the blinding light of a seemingly, rushing swirl of raw spiritual energy at play.  Sonic vibrations reducing me to free radical atoms aligning to the forever ringing sound of Godself, enigmatically radiating divinity into the inky darkness of no-thingness.  A vortexial vacuuming ecstasy consumed my soul boundaries... evaporating me, myself and I with an ease that can be most terrifying!  :o

The fascinating thing about such complete, enlightening ego-deaths, is the immense mystery behind it all.  Personal cognizance evaporates with lightening speed and some ancient, yet unborn force draws the psychonautical pilgrim beyond the beyondest of possible beyonds.  Dissipation, annihilation, rebirth and unbound bliss coalesce into an explossive fluttering of self and non-self.  To this day, I speculate that such blinding effulgence is like an unbroken beam of Divine light, whose vibration sets into motion sonic resonance, which rings out an eternal note, one struck from the epicenter of all universes, all at once.  Even the filmiest of veils weave intricate patterning, the most subtly luminous, laser-like interwebbing spiraling from the inside to the outside...  and back again. 

Still, most of the experience shatters the fragile paradigmn of person-to-person communication into infinitesimally elusive degrees of dualistic interplay, eventually silenced, dissipating into the emptiness of complete non-duality.  It's all far too ineffibley transcendental to successfully dissect with our conditional human reason and therefore, defies all quantification, as per being an Absolute, clear light void.  So naturally, rather than chasing my own tail, in terms of worded linguistic efforts, I have been silent.  Until today, that is.  I journeyed for the 12th time with the sacrement this afternoon.  It was fueled by less than half the amount but still was very mystical in nature.  Yet, I was still subjectively present for nearly 85% of the geyser-like, ascending trip.  Enough to perhaps rekindle my desire to share my vision quests with fellow travelers?   <3

So mind-bogglingly beyond words, yet, the experience emphatically fuses one's soul awareness to the trajectory of the infinity of this present moment.  Personality is, blasted into a formless limitlessness so vast it scares me half to death, each and every time it devours my very subjectivity...  opening an empty/fullness pulsing in symbiosis with a blindingly bright, insubstantial effulgence. 

Meanwhile in the material realms, pulsars, exploding supernovas, black wormholes thirsty for energy, spiralling galexies creating solar system after solar system, sky-rocketing cometary bodies, earthly life and microscopic deep interiors create completely geometric phenomena.  Such incredible symmetry that super-charged particles spiral together in seamless unity.  Waves of particles dancing freely within a wholly symbiotic pulse.  Atoms, neutrons, electrons, quarks and tinier and tinier ethereal nanoparticles ad infinitum... appear in harmony and appearing equally as all things, a pulse to all beating hearts, everywhere all at once (and forevermore). 

Ultimately, I humbly speculate that deep within such an immense blinding whiteness, is a love too difficult to convey in words.  Too beautiful to adequately exalt and far, far too ineffible to grasp with mortal heart, mind nor even intuition...  exists the core, zero-point field of pure indivisibility.  Perhaps the bright void from whence everything manifests from therein or simulates out of?  Nondual presence.  So great a field of sparkling, shimmering luminescence (Omniscient and oh so perfect a causative Source) it dispels the mesmerizing illusion of birth, death and our fleeting human dreamscapes.  Well then, it seems that I have said an awful lot about what cannot feasibly be spoken of.  I'm sure that the irony is not lost to most of you guys?  Have a happy and healthy Holiday Season!  AUM   _/|\_ _/|\_
These random sentences were jotted down just hours after one of my most powerful 5 journeys.  I just found this piece of scrap paper that I had written down a series of choppy, flowery descriptives.  This is hardly poetry but is fueled by the nondual field with this most sacred of medicines.  _/|\_ _/|\_

"Mudras & Kundalini spontaneously bloom from the immersion.  The songbird takes flight through 12 planes, plus Infinity."

"Parallel bars of ascending light rays radiate a vortexial plume of energy.  Harmonics of the dual frequencies entwined, together unite in one supreme overtone (all sonic oscillations melting into one AUM vibration)."

"The breathless state and unmoving body, coalescing in euphoria.  Light dissolving into light abounds.  Empty sky, limitless expanse of bliss beats inside of one's drumming heart."

"Ergo, Absolute bliss=Divine rapture=Satori=Samadhi are indeed noble words...   but no uttered words can capture the effulgent fusion."

"Euphoric, enigmatic quietude absorbs the gesture of self...  revealing a grand transcendence.  Wings spread wide beyond all thought, lift the minds heart, forevermore flying into Godself."
Good day, one and all.  I thought I might just post a thread within this sadly neglected, spiritual sub-forum about the mystical and wholly nondual nature of the 5-MeO-DMT experience.  Granted, speaking in human linguistic terms of the eclipsing of oneself and the sacred molecule, one can but fall tragically shy of the mark, as how does one catch the ineffible in mere words?  So we always fail to cohessively dissect the reality of the supreme unification rationally...  it burns itself forevermore within our very souls.  Ergo, nothing can rbe said, yet there is still value in sharing fractured insights and slivers of our most life-changing, supra transcendental epiphanies.  At least, I truly feel that this is of paramount importance and I strongly suspect that I am not alone in this regard?

Over 2,500 years ago, the venerable Chinese sage Lao Tzu, wrote that,
"The Tao that can be described is not the eternal Tao.  The name that can be spoken is not the eternal name.  The nameless is the boundary of Heaven and Earth.  The named is the mother of creation.  Freed from grasping, one can see the hidden mystery.  By desiring to hold this fleeting world, one can only see what are seemingly "real" manifestations of this indivisible force, and not the true essence."
(Isolated within one's own dreamy illusion of transient, forever changing appearances).

So, this timeless conundrum is not just limited to psychonautical voyagers alone, it is equally paramount to all of humankind, as a whole.  Given that the ancient Taoist sages were alchemists, who can truly say if entheogenic compounds were not in part responsible for some of these deeply cosmic and poignantly poetic observations?  That being said, I would like to steer this discussion towards the commonalities shared betwixt the ancient mystics and/or present day explorers, who with some trepidation, venture into the realm revealed by Toad secretions or synthetic 5-MeO-DMT.

We all collectively share many of the very same paradigmatic, existential dynamics.  In symbiosis, we are each and all of us, awaiting the ultimate awakening from our own self-inflicted imprisonment.  We are all born into this world, we incrementally learn to navigate within this seemingly material universe, which we co-create together with one another and within the measurement of the time-space-continuum...  so too, we all eventually die physically.  Thus we freely choose, whether we believe we do or that we do not, to essentially dream ourselves into the living fabric of this 3-dimensional, mortal lifetime.  And ultimately...  we pass away and then return to whence we arose from, waaaaaaaaaaay way back into the unborn & undying Source of Omniversal Being.  As such, the 5 sacrement lovingly (and often terrifyingly) gifts us with magnificent glimpses of true reality beyond the confines of ourselves.

We are suddenly pulled instantly into an explosion of purest energy, we are helplessly drawn into a skyrocketing journey reaching the borders of sheerest oblivion and then, the molecule drops us right back down into our own dream bubble of egoic mesmerism.  I do humbly feel that such spirit voyages are very, very important for the growth of our awareness, facilitating the remembrance of our very souls.  For tasting the nectarine force of eternity is, as far as I'm concerned, a gift more precious than any worldly treasure.  How lucky are we?  Well, at least once we move past our instinctual fear of death and dying and our resistance to ego dissolution, shattered within a stasis of total self erasure.  Even so, I have come to emphatically believe that the unbound joyousness and limitless ecstatic bliss generated from such a full release dose of this anointment, is a prize superseding any degree or measurement, in conceptual terms...  a veritable Holy Grail.   

I feel strongly that seamlessly dissolving into the undifferentiated brilliance of the full-blown whiteout experience is by far, the absolute pinnacle of individual existence.  Ironically, it cannot seemingly bloom exponentially until the human host's mind is wholly stilled and subjective witnessing of the phenomenon cleansed away (albeit temporarily).  Curiously though, there are supra-luminous impressions etched upon the heart and soul of the intrepid pilgrim.  Within such an enigmatic pause, waves of energy fuel spiritual awakening, which washes over the soul bird in it's blinded, yet intuitive flight.  Ergo, much can be gleaned from the immersion. 

Buddhists speak of a neon bright emptiness, an effulgently shimmering void without any degree of any distinct thing-ness...  an eternal expanse of formless force, radiating epicentrically, all that could ever become a potential reality in bloom.  They named this Sunyata in ancient India.  Paradoxically extending into disillusion of dimensional, finite being, the individual self disappears and all directional thought ceases to be detectable.  Not just an absolute nothing...  but still, no thing at all.  Like the Chinese notion of the Tao, it remains free of any dichotomy or fractured dualism.  It's nature defies our fragile reasoning and vain attempts to accurately describe this all-pervasive presence through reason or definitive quantification.  God then,effulgently remains shrouded in complete mystery.  That being said, we are ever drawn like moths to the holy flame.  5-MeO-DMT takes one to this enigmatic point and further beyond the beyondest of any knowable beyonds.  Save for our nondual epiphanies, it is wholly unknowable to the isolated witness (in terms of rational, subjective thinking). 

Still, while tantalizing the conscious-awareness of the intrepid spirit body with the exquisite flavor of forever-ness, this always present, zero-point field of unbreakable unity, magically consumes the barriers and destroys the very bars which imprison the immortal Omniself and enlightens the indwelling soul-witness to the Source.  This is surely the realm of the mystical state of Samadhi.  Please feel free and encouraged to chime in with any ideas.  I so marvel at such gems of my fellow human family member's unique insights. And while any talk at all is kind of futile, certainly, I value any offerings with great enthusiasm.  While attempting to speak of the miracle of the nondual state escapes our fervent grasp, I submit that there is much beauty and wisdom to share with one another.  Namaste & Namaskar. _/|\_ _/|\_
It had been almost exactly two calendar years since my inaugural voyage with the enigmatic God molecule, 5-MeO-DMT...  and this my ninth journey, I imbibed the largest amount of the sacrament yet, 13mg freebase.  The set and setting were nearly identical, as it was a gloriously sunny summer day with blue skies and puffy white clouds lazily floating across the sky.  I felt carefree, excited and most inspired...  and that is quite an understatement.  The crickets and cicadas were singing their enchanting summer songs and dragon flies drifted upon the easy summer breeze.  Birds chipped along in flawless harmony.  I felt ready to offer myself to the immense force of the medicine, ready to sacrifice my dreamscape to the undifferentiated power of the infinite Godhead...  like a tiny air bubble, effortlessly washed away by the force of a raging river.  Or perhaps so much cosmic dust, blown into the beyondest of beyonds?  "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust." 

Admittedly, this is always VERY terrifying.  Right?  I don't care how much experience one has with other entheogens, 5-MeO is the pinnacle.  In my own journeys, this is as close to dying as I've encountered with any psychedelic substance before.  There is always the sense of actual physical death and it is coupled with the understanding that nothing of my dream of existence was ever real.  I, you, us, them...  none of it was ever real at all.  Sentience is impermanent and is a mirage of sorts.  If so, had by whom?  We may never know.  Some things defy encapsulation.  But who doesn't love a good mystery?  Well, I suspect that you all intuit what I am getting at.  Near death experiences without powerful psychedelic catalysts are much the same but from my own dramatic experience of drowning in a swimming pool, as a young boy, it is radically less explosive.  But since I didn't actually expire permanently, I can't say with any modicum of certainty that it doesn't accelerate to such a state.  No one can ever return to tell us, anyway.

Obviously, the greatest impact of the Sacred Medicine left me in a vacuum, an entirely entranced focus, one without even the sense if being an observer to the experience unfolding.  Still, upon partial re-coalescence, an immense wealth of omniversal knowledge cascaded into my newly forming subjectivity.  It was like a profound remembrance.  An epiphany which topped any epiphany I'd ever gleaned.  There was this timeless presence which eluded my sense of origin or direction.  After all, when the inside and the outside are identical, it is impossible to contextualize anything nor grasp any quantifiable concept or meaning about such mysterious states of perception.  That being said, an ancient voice was singing a song which contained the entirety of everything, while remaining fixed within it's forever enigmatic no-thingness.  AUM... out from the roaring silence, AUM.  I am here now.  I am awake within this beginningless, endless moment. I always have been.

It dawned upon my infantile ability to think at all, that such a remembrance was the whole purpose for my existence.  It had been all along.  It is fundamentally all of our purpose for existing.  I seemed to comprehend that I chose to be here.  We all do, in a nutshell.  I don't know why and nobody can truly ever know why.  It just is as it is.  We naturally, are here because we decided that we are to be here now.  A very long journey of awakening had now crested for this mortal dreamer.  A notion arose that there is no reason that we appear out of an absolute realm of supreme void.  Some things just transcend reason.  Ergo, the universe recreates itself in an unbridled, spontaneous manner.  The entirety of the cosmos, both microcosmic and macrocosmic, blooms out of itself.  Who can say why?  And I suspect that we each, likewise, blossom of this same nondual field, this very same source.  It's a bit like finding oneself back in the womb, but preparing to give birth to oneself.  Does that make any sense? 

I began to feel saved, if you will.  Gratitude filled me completely.  I felt a pristine love, self-obliterating one like no other kind of love I have tasted.  Rather, the degree that I was experiencing love was far greater and far more intoxicating than I'd heretofore ever had.  Complete unity without division.  I would never feel alone again, as I was certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was quintessentially, all one.  "I and my God are one."  Taking this one conclusion further, it became palpable that while I myself, as a separate part of the whole, was a cognitive illusion of sorts, playing hide and seek with myself...  the Divine was not illusory in any way.  It is the only reality, cleverly hidden within everything else.  The Omniself resides in complete resplendense and always shall.  Therefore, the only thing of reality was our core essence residing within the Unified Field. This brought on a flood of tears and like a waterfall, a cascadence of ecstasy beyond anything I had ever known.  This "cascadence" poured down from the highest plane I am able to conceive of and flooded my mind's heart with the kind of euphoria that I hadn't imagined in my wildest dreams.

Yes, I have had this experience of Amrita before.  It is gifted to the thirsty human spirit from the epicentrical Source.   It always seems to settle in the heart and spill over into the entirety of one's being.  I was at last, inextricably home!  I had finally realized both my purpose and my own small destiny.  I fell forwards in deepest humility and thanked God with all of my rapidly re-crystallizing urgency.  I vowed to live more consciously, to live far more earnestly, with more focussed attention and to abide in deeper harmony with the entire universe at play.  I lovingly thank you all for sharing this world and the intertwined strings of our ever expanding dreamscapes together. 

Sat Chit Ananda_/|\_ _/|\_
I never wrote an eighth voyage trip report, for a number of reasons.  Primarily, and I sense that a lot of folks here have had a very similar quandary...  there are just no feasible words that properly encapsulate the experience.  Reaching to touch the face of Brahman and then...  being surprised that it is one's own face, but before the soul reaches God-realization...   it explodes into formlessness, wholly erased within the blinding whiteness of the absolute, purely effulgent emptiness, wholly void of any iota of division! 

My eighth immersion was an epic 5-MeO fusion of the finite self within the unlimited web of the infinite, the Omniself reawakening. A dissolution of my dream identity and an experience of always having been undifferentiated conscious-awareness.   The Alpha and the Omega undivided forevermore, yet paradoxically, rebirthed anew within this present now, as the cosmic dance whirls on and on...  and on.  So, how does one travel as an individual soul, deeply into the blinding whiteness of the nondual state and encapsulate the spirit journey in mortal wording? 

Language itself is perhaps the most dualistic phenomenon in human behavior.  It deals with symbols which are representative of the kind of reality in which things exist appart from one another, co-existing as a cohesive whole.  But how does one capture the indivisible?  At least, conceptually and linguistically.  So when the subject/object dichotomy vanishes, or rather, dissolves back into the source of all being...  there becomes this enormous task of talking about the non-dual state, The Godhead, awakening afresh from the dream of dualism.  It cannot really be done in a literal sense.  At least not enough, eh?

That being said, today is the day following my ninth immersion and I thought I might share of my musings and observations from the previous soul flight, number 8 in a carefully measured series of rituals.  I had put into words various fragments and ideas but was unable to fashion them into an interesting thread to read.  Perhaps I might just cut and paste them herein?  As a caveat, it must be strongly noted that nothing at all can be spoken of during full eclipsing mode.  From the state of full unification, there is no mortal self to bear witness to anything at all.  This dream bubble of a solid self is popped effortlessly and within the roaring silence of eternity...  who then is there to bear witness or try to speak at all? 

Still, upon approaching seamless union and the eventual return to perceptual cognizance, much can be recalled.  I consider the recollections to be shards of some immeasurable crystalline design.  Sparks from an eternal flame, which burns so bright as to blind the mortal entity and rob it if it's fixed identity. Ultimately, I humbly feel that hints and tidbits of remembrance can effectively be culled and recorded, pre and post-peaking only.  So, here are a few odd pieces of a worded collage of sorts, jotted down following my 8th journey with this most sacred of molecules.  I had intended on weaving an elaborate verbal tapestry in honor of the anointment but then the whole Covid-19 paradigmn threw me so far off track that I never quite got around to it. 

So, I am now offering these verbal sketches as a sort of ode to the medicine.  A fragile and wholly imperfect attempt to capture the entirety of the cosmos with a glass jar.  Please pardon the irony but my aim fis ever true and my love for you all is as genuine as a baby's first inhalation.  Without further adieu, here are a few scraps of insight and epiphany that I'd sincerely wish to share.  Perhaps in hopes of mapping out a wee bit more of this immense, overwhelmingly powerful catalyst into Infinity.

The first snippet:  Kundalini, spontaneous Mudras and the cascading flow of Amrita.

"Good evening, folks.  I wanted to discuss some off the impressions I have observed just prior to peaking and post peaking, during my solo ceremonies with this powerful sacrement.  There have been several repeated phenomena which occurred during all of my eight journeys with 5-MeO.  Of course, during the full immersion...  one dissolves wholly into the blinding neon whiteness.  There ceases to be any difference between the inside and the outside, self and other, light and darkness.  All thoughts cease to arise as one's very self, likewise, ceases to maintain any iota of corporeal reality.

Deep within what I call, "the eclipsing", there is naught but undifferentiated formlessness and no one to witness such a state of being/non-being.  During the full blown whiteout experience, the nondual field absorbs everything back into Source energy.  Brahman.  I can only imagine why it allows for the dream of individual self, only to shatter the illusion with such force it sends the ego into a temporary oblivion, even as it creates the potential for every possibility, form, substance and circumstance.  The greatest mystery and the closest thing I know to limitless love is this blessed experience, facilitated by this miraculous compound.  No other molecule that I've imbibed, has so much divine presence or such immense spiritual impact.

Ascending into this fulcrum of pure whiteness, I was accutely aware of Kundalini activation snaking it's way up my spinal axis.  At each chakra interphase, sweeping/flowing energy intersects at each the central point and rises in said fashion to the next higher crossroads (so to speak).  As the geyser-like force reached my heart, there was this incredible blooming sensation. The energy made my material heart feels as if it might burst!  Stroking out during a medicine journey would be so counterproductive that it hardly needs mention.  Lol.  Upwards the release arise.  I was almost choking with ecstasy as the power expanded into my throat region.  I gasped for air and then, chanted OM for what seemed an eternity.  Who was that singing?  Where did the sound begin, inside or beyond myself?

So unlike every other psychedelic substance, there was only the briefest of lingering at the Third Eye.  This has always amazed me, as so much of the art & science of meditation is focussed intently upon the Ajna chakra.  That being said, I did see such effulgence radiating from above, that it was almost too much to hold my gaze upon.  Almost, mind you.  I was wholly mesmerized by the incredible beauty and radiance shining it's white luminosity into every corner of the empty void of space.  Moments later, I felt an unfoldment at the top of my crown, partially to the rear of my head.  Some esoteric school in India refer to this a the Bindu, others do not. But the unfolding was like a large flower's petals opening further and further and further still. 

Seconds later, I conscious-awareness had arisen to what I label, the 8th chakra. It resides an arm's length above the top of the head.  It is not a part of the physical body, yet, it is rather like the puppeteer maneuvering the marionette of the individuated soul throughout it's dreaming journey. 
Beyond this level is always so difficult to describe, call it the 9th chakra or the seat upon which God takes as a manifestation within creation. There is no duality within said field of existential being.  There is this almost primordial, haunting idea/declaration/expression, "I am here...  I have now become awakened within this present moment."   Whose notion of being existent elludes me, for where there is but The One, who actually hears this message? 

Then what seems to take an eternity in the making, there is naught but an absolute quietude.  A stillness that defies any quantification.  No sonic vibrations, no pulsations of radiating holy light.  No one to witness the miracle of creation, the blinding effulgence, nor surrender to the undifferentiated glory of The Unified Field. This will always remain shrouded in complete mystery, for without the usual mental conditioning of perceiving reality as a subject-object dichotomy, oneself evaporates like so much smoke in a breeze. Only upon returning from the grand eclipsing, can the state encountered be integrated and comprehended to any degree. 

Traveling with this molecule has always included, up on my return to self, quite a bit of spontaneous hand mudras and gesturing.  Almost as if a language far more geometric than verbal, flows into crystallization.  Often too, I am still chanting OM and still drinking in the nectar of Amrita, which pours from above into the chalice of my mind's heart. It overflows into every cell of my corporeal, physical body.  Fine tuning one's auric body and healing the bio-organism which gently holds my soul with the confines of the time-space-continuum.  Cascading down upon my thirsty soul like the blissful waters of eternity.  It pours outwards through my tear ducts and inside of my head, it drips sweetly from high up within my nasal cavity.  It's nectarine taste is immortality itself. Truly, I humbly feel that such miracles are the finest blessings gifted from the Source." 
_/|\_ _/|\_
Greetings all and Happy Holidays!  I wanted to share a wee bit about my last two journeys with this sacred molecule.  So much of the intensity, immense expansion and mind shattering force are by far, so beyond words that it is ridiculous to attempt to properly describe the experience.  Even so, there is much to learn and some epiphanies worth sharing.  From my own small view of things, this sacrement both shatters the self one has become accustomed to perceive consensus reality with...  and wholly rebirths said "self".  I've felt for some time now that our sentient selves are lens which look at existence from many, many vantage points. Much like facets of the very same jewel.

Each voyage has been preceded by the usual preflight jitters.  After all, when greeting Infinity face to face, who isn't rather intimidated?  Even so, I always approach the eclipsing with reverence and humility.  No one who has even had the anointment with 5 can say with any degree of honesty that they weren't concerned that yes...  you've finally gone waaaaaaay too far this time and now it's time to physically die.  Oh fuck...  of course, this would be counterproductive.  But without the urgency one feels at such moments, 100% surrender is quite difficult for the human ego and letting go completely, an obstacle.

What has become very clear to me is that there are specific stages that such exalted levels of conscious-awareness move through, manifesting as clearly defined parameters of expansion and self dissolution.  Well, at least until one enters the bright whiteness of undifferentiated being and so, loses consciousness of being a soul reincarnated within a mortal body, instinctively living within a dualistic paradigmn.  Loses the mirrored reflection, the I-me-mine mesmerism of separation which fragments the Absolute into myriad refractions of ever-changing duality, dreamscapes of self-illusion.  From all that I've witnessed since my inaugural voyage, there is an incredible loop of attention, which travels through each soul in most unique ways.  For myself, whoever I dream myself to be in this material lifetime, the energy rapidly arises, so powerfully that all one can do is release oneself into the magnificent bloom. 

I cannot say with any degree of rational certainty, nor any modicum of quantifiable assurance, that my experiences resemble those of other fellow Hive members.  But my travels are very, very Yogic in nature.  One of the primary impressions is the explossive rise of kundalini, the serpent energy.  I feel/sense/hear/experience and actually see the vertical ascension.  The force goes so quickly up the spinal column to the appex of the crown region and then, far above and beyond this point, that there is little time to observe the shift in attention, before going into a glorious whiteout experience.  The effect is that of stopping the mind, dissolving the definitions and boundaries of one's isolated self reflection...  that no words can adequately convey the terror, ecstasy and unbound love which occur at the peak moment.  It would be foolish and in vain to bother putting to verse the beatific point wherein oneself merges into the limitlessness and immeasurable effulgence of Brahman.   _/|\_

Of course, as with every entheogen humankind has journeyed with, there are hints.  There are impressions and epiphanies which linger in our mind's heart, suggesting that our very source is also our very own innate core and epicentrical being.  Unlike many current psychonauts, I do not disdain the notion of "God" or feel awkward about discovering that I am one with the entirety of the universe unfolding.  I am frankly, overjoyed that my perspective has transformed from worshipping an unseen Divine being, to understanding something of the most sacred realms present always, although rarely glimpsed with mortal eyes.  The unified field of undifferentiated spirit is within everything.  It manifests itself as everything, yet, remains unbound and indivisible in it's (our) unborn & undying glory.  Each waving field of particles embodies this force.  Each bird sings homage to this eternal song.

Along the way towards such immersion, there are a symphony of sonic oscillations, waves of vibration and pulsations of blinding white light.  While the fractals are subtle, the power and energy that this sacred medicine bestows is far more precious than any kaleidoscopic, fractal geometry which entertains our mind's eye.  Sonic oscillations ring out beyond the realm of material, earthly life.  The voice of the One can be heard in sheerest omniscience.  Ultimately, the mind stops as the ego dissolves.  Perception becomes meaningless and one is exploded into an eternal quietude. 

That being said, I feel that I have experienced insights shortly prior to and immediately post peaking, all of this incredible information is available.  Patterns of raw energy and cosmic melodies combine to weave intricate mandala-esque, sacred geometric designs as pure energy.  Purest, quintessential being reveals itself as the light of infinity and more so, makes itself awake and aware within the soul of the limitations of individual human mind. I often find myself bowed down in the Ardha Kurmasana (half tortoise pose), wholly humbled and surrendered to what is by any standard of belief, Supreme.  For one who is shattered and in turn, reborn in sheerest awe by this miracle of existence, awakens to a spiritual remembrance that predates anything else.  I am reminded of the Biblical plight of Moses, overwhelmed by his experience.  He fell in humble reverence and sheer terror, bowing prostrate before the illumination of the Burning Bush, that he trembled and surrendered himself wholly.   _/|\_

Granted, at the appex of the anointment, there is technically no one present to witness anything at all.  Many folks go straight into whiteout and return awestruck but without any recollection of the peak moment.  They know to the depth of their being that something truly immense has occurred but fail to recall anything save a totally white, blank canvas.  Perhaps this is so because said fellows have not been trained in deep meditation?  I often wonder.  But meditation incrementally hones the focus and deepens one's attention.  Life can be fully experienced without any thoughts at all.  If enough practice is done, I feel that the voyager can stay conscious, or perhaps better to say, "supra-conscious" as Sri Aurobindo used to call this point of focus? 

Anyway, my intention is to clarify the impressions that this molecule infuses within my mind's heart.  I am thrown into such an intense vortex of Divine presence that I am wholly undone, scattered into so much cosmic dust and then, reborn anew to a prayer to become a better person.  Radiating far greater empathy, compassion and loving service towards a seamless, symbiotic unity with all life, shining clearly within all thoughts, what is said and done.  I sincerely thank you all for being here now, sharing this beautiful and terrifying reawakening.  May the Omniversal pulse dawn within each beating heart.   <3
It's been exactly one month since my fifth intrepid journey with the holy 5 sacrament.  Honestly, it's taken that long to even partiality integrate the insights and revelations that washed over me until whoever I dream myself to be, had fully surrendered to the immense waving force washing me into oblivion. 

Just prior to this most recent nondual voyage, I had kind of developed a pre flight jitters to self-obliteration, creating a passing hesitancy of sorts...  transcended by that perceptual shift towards stepping further and further beyond all one's self orientation, to fearlessly dwelve even deeper into the very core essence of the one true source energy, highlighted perfectly within and without any and all strata of being.  Light seeds have opened and bloom wonderfully.  Sacred geometry has revealed Itself anew and it's all good.   _/|\_ _/|\_ _/|\_
Greetings to each and all of you.  I was blessed to embark upon my fourth experience with 5-MeO-DMT, an intense immersion within the timeless bloom of this present moment, this eternally dawning now.  As with my first three journeys, last summer, I entered the blinding luminosity of a full-blown whiteout experience.  I was fully conscious every minute of the direct interphase.  Oh my God!   _/|\_ _/|\_

I have studied the phenomenon of conscious-awareness for close to forty five years now, since I was a wee lad of 16 years old and have little by little, incrementally come to understand that consciousness itself, is much like the nature of light.  Consciousnesskeeps can be enveloped in darkness, as with the unconscious-ness of the deep sleep state, semi-conscious, as with our "normal" waking life and even supra-conscious, as with heightened states triggered directly by entheogens.  This sacred medicine opens up yet another level of conscious-awareness, one which transcends the subject/object dichotomy. 

I refer to this state as Omni-consciousness.  It is a nondual frequency of mind. Well, way beyond what we ordinarily conceive of as being of the mind. It's really more of a blossoming fulcrum of ever- expanding universal mind.  I believe it is a state without any iota of thought, without any degree of self-identification and exists as a still point of unwaivering attention, one in which all differentiation dissolves into a holistic pulsation of undifferentiated, Absolute being.  During full white-out mode, ideas change from one's routine of accustomed thought patterning, to a deep pause of such a mechanism.  Within such a silencing of the mortal mind, there becomes a space for other modes of experience.  Opening doors to perceptual vistas beyond the beyondest of beyonds.

Each time I journey with this molecule, I am swept away by the incredible sonics accompanying the immense shift in attention.  So much about the trip is purely Yogic and Tantric in nature.  What the Sufi mystics have named "Shabd" (divine music), becomes highly discernible as one's concentration occilates at higher and still higher levels, more expanded and primordial vibratory frequencies.  Behind and deeply within these ringing harmonies, rumbles the sound of eternity, the overtone which ignites all motion from an immeasurable stillness...  whose sonic birth echoes the holy droning song of AUM, whose alluring tone is eternally buzzing.  This ignites a dawning and it is refracted within the myriad reflections of the One.  Twin currents wrestle entwined, each a reflection of the other, opposite energy polarity. 

It's sound always pulls my fixation from the mortal to the immortal.  The One expression naturally creates this grand, panorama of diversified life, upon which the light of God freely shines, mirroring it's Absolute intelligence and simultaneously, radiates an all-embracing touch of a love.  A freedom that has no destination, preference nor intended design aimed freely at each point in the picture.  It simply manifests into being from the great white void and emits consciousness...  who can rightly say just why...  simply because it does. 

Again, there was a paired interplay between the observer and that being observed.  One moment no-thing was happening...  all was undifferentiated brilliance.  An effulgence within any shadow to recognize it as effulgence.  So blinding as to be wholly ineffible.  The next moment, there was the sense of a sort of gravity of self.  A vested interest and yearning desire to become...  to be existent.  I am.  I am here.  I have always been here.  I shall always be here, forevermore.  Then, all dissolves back into the undifferentiated.  Here, I am unborn.  I am wholly unformed.  I am before I am.  I am yet to arrive as who I am.  I simply am.  Am I really?  Lol   ::)

This enigmatic fluttering counterpoint was matched by the hugely rapid beating of my heart.  This dichotomy betwixt the clearly perceivable interconnection of the infinite web of being or unified field and the all-pervasive emptiness and insubstanciality hidden within everything, the unbroken core of the indivisibility of the inherent divinity which seats as epicentrical to each and all.  I guess what I am driving at is that from one millisecond to the next, the whole of the universe came into intricately majestic form, while that which cannot be divided hums along indivisibly, re-absorbing God and the entire cosmos as if it never had even happened at all. 

Learning to regulate the heartbeat during the imbibing of this powerful sacrement, has become more natural to me.  Remembering to breathe evenly and keeping the attention steadily focussed upon the Omni-conscious activity throbbing inside of my physical shell and coursing throughout the circuitry existent as humankind.  The release of kundalini continues to sky-rocket from the base of the spine, to the highest portal atop of the higher crown region or seventh chakra. 

In my deepest inner experiences, this area is where the energy explodes into a cascading fountain, flooding into the entirety of the auric/ethereal, Atmaic body, which is seamlessly sheathed within the 3 dimensional material body.  As this occurs, tears spill from the corners of my eyes and Amrita trickles from the upper brain to the center (pineal) and furthest rear area of the throat, tasting sweet and most euphoria inducing. 

This then is Samadhi?  It cannot be said from our relative point in the dualistic paradigmn.  Such ecstatic immersion is too transcendental to describe in mere words alone.  It's all about the direct vibe.  I feel that the entrancement is more about pure sensation, soul resonance and our interconnection with the whole of the great web of life.  Of course, during the full eclipsing and the whiteout peak...  nothing but the whiteness and immensity of an indescribable energy source is known as oneself (one self).  I believe that the very same singularity of "one self", is perrenially existent as everyone, everywhere, always and forevermore. 

And that is all that is known.  In so knowing, the knower is consumed by the knowledge.  At such a moment, there is really no longer anyone to observe anything.  Only room for One.  Even so, conscious-awareness still abides and it does so in it's own Omnipotent way.  From this side of the looking glass, it is the reflection of the faceless face of Brahman.   _/|\_ _/|\_

Two days ago, there was a distinct ascendance from the very tipping-top of the rear crown area, to a vortex of energy an arms length higher still.  It is an eight chakra and the point at which the soul enacts life through the body.  Sort of like a puppeteer manipulating a marionette but without mortal motive or desire.  From this realm of conscious-awareness, everything appears to unfold spontaneously.  Whatever takes place within the fertile dreamscape of the ego puppet, belongs to the dreaming marionette, endlessly dancing out of an admixture of fear and aspiration, weaving many unfolding desires into the storyline and as a dualistic puppet, remains ever hungry for true love.  <3
Science / Omega Brainwave Activity
September 10, 2018, 09:35:32 PM
Good evening All.  I would like to present an abstract theory that I initially conceived of decades ago but was rekindled this morning when I watched a video of brother Martin Ball having his brainwave activity monitored while imbibing 5-MeO-DMT.  The process was fascinating and quite remarkable.  I did feel, however, that the scientific paradigm utilized was based wholly on the known territories established by consensus research. 

I feel that there exists a sixth brain wave state, possibly even a seventh but for now let's just focus upon the theory of omega brainwave activity within human cognition.  We are all familiar with:  alpha, theta, delta, beta and gamma.  Yet somehow it seems that there is something else.  I propose the notion of an omega brainwave field.  Much of the mystical experience exists in such a hypothetical state.

I have long suspected that without a closer look at alternate brainwave activities which vibrates on another frequency altogether, we might be missing something quite significant about being human.  Any research along said lines would necessitate a far reaching look into the brain patterning of clairvoyants, monks, mystics, sages and especially, psychonauts.  Does anyone here know if any studies directed to such criteria? 

Admittedly, while technically speaking, I am not a scientist (unless being a trained and well seasoned gemologist holds any pedigree amongst other scientific members, collectively holding the banner of logic and reason, herein)...  but I sense something happening that takes place in a field of conscious-awareness heretofore unexplored.  I've tried to present similar ideas over at the DMT Nexus and had my ass handed to me on a plate.  That being said, I believe that the mystical cannot be separated from the scientific.   Any comments would be most welcomed and appreciated.   _/|\_ _/|\_

Oops, here's the video of Martin's brain scan while peaking on our God Molecule:
Greetings to you all, good people.  After being a member of this beautiful collective for 15 months now, at last I have crossed the 5-MeO-DMT threshold, wholly immersed into the mystical anointment.  It was lab synthesized freebase, not toad "venom" and I was alone.  I must joyfully shout out loud that the long-awaited interphase with this glorious molecule, has just occurred and left me nothing short of reborn.   _/|\_

While I had decided that I would take my very first plunge into the medicine some have named the "God Molecule", taking that leap into the undifferentiated sea of Infinite consciousness, late last night.  However, circumstances changed my intended plans.  I had an interesting pre-trip connection with the 8mg crystalline matter, where there was a kind of communication between us.  I ended up sitting in meditation for quite some time. I sensed a power from this molecule that superseded any other entheogenic substance.  I would soon discover just how true this was!

So, early this afternoon, I finally embarked upon what would turn out to be the most powerful psychedelic experience of my life.  I sandwiched 8 mg of crystalline powder between a cradle of pure cannabis indica and a sativa-heavy hybrid.  The 5-MeO was miraculously sent to me by a kind, truly soul-resonant friend.  I am so VERY grateful, my good brother!  I took a long, slow toke, not wanting to burn the sacrament.  I exhaled and took a really gentle, super deep hit.  A life changing inhalation opened a door, so to speak, and the force of the universe drew my soul into the ineffible core of the beginningless beginning.   _/|\_

Much of what I experienced today could never accurately be encapsulated in mere words.  A great deal of the voyage was moving so quickly and with such overwhelming intensity, that I was sure that I was truly dying.  I had to remind myself to breathe, often and with increasing urgency as the peak approached.  Honestly, I have never been so quickly and thoroughly blown out of my socks before....  ever, nothing quite compares!!!  In short matter of moments, my ego's self was suddenly shattered and so, dissolved all fixation of self into a translucency which defies any quantification.  Even NN-DMT pales in terms of the raw force, immediacy and the wide-open degree of sheer spiritual upliftment.  And that's saying a lot. 

Within seconds, my attention exploded from the normal/relative to the immensity of the absolute, from finite to infinite, from personal to supra-personal.  Nothing I've experienced even compares with this Sacred Medicine.  I seriously thought I might expire, given the pounding heartbeat and the rushing energy coursing throughout my system.  I was devoured by the sheer power of the Omnipotent light, even as the ringing/roaring melodies of the universal frequency lifted my conscious-awareness higher and higher, into the radiant bloom of the Unified Field of Being, pulling my enraptured attention into the deepest soul resonance.  The kundalini release was so dynamic that it was with great effort in concentration, that I was able to maintain a balance.  Almost like riding mechanical bull...  but the bull was the unbridled force of fully activated internal energy.

Were I more articulate tonight, I would hope to be able to express that I have never faced such a Divine awakening, such a total whiteout experience, as suddenly and expanssively!  My sense of individualized self was stripped away with such immense force, that  I was ill equipped to hold onto subjectifying the greater quintessence of this magical trip, though, I believe it can be properly conveyed.  I need to ground this epiphany to be able to decode it's many profound teachings.  Integration surely takes some time.  Soon though, I will be able to communicate more of the finer details that transpired during the interphase, those subtle aspects and difficult to describe effects.  I do vividly remember most of the experience.

Tonight...  however, I am a wee bit weary, although most tranquil.  I love you all and wish you all the best in life.  Tomorrow night I will visit again, and would love to exchange those salvageable remembrances with such a nice collective of folks sharing good vibrations. <3
During a significant number of my experiences with psychedelics I have, at the very highest peak moments, had experiences of blinding white light.  These are always perceived through "the third eye", the Ajna chakra.  Actually, it is technically a clear and luminous light, a radiating white effulgence but one refracting an endless array of shimmering rainbow colors, each hue most vibrant and magnificent. 

I have eagerly fused my consciousness with said inviting brilliance and steered my intent merging my shifting awareness with it's infinite, loving presence.  The mind then stops for a divine pause...  and oneself is totally shattered by the immensity of the expansion into absolute being. 

Sacred Medicines like:  LSD-25, peyote/mescaline, psilocybin mushrooms and NN-DMT, do surely facilitate this kind if blissful whiteout experience.  Can those who've been blessed by the Toad Medicine, organically or synthetically produced, shed any personal/transpersonal experience reports here? 

Granted, visions and auditory sensations emanating from the pineal gland are essentially 6th chakra phenomena.  It would be awesome to hear about some of the sounds and visions (or moments of sweetest, quitest emptiness) encountered with 5-MeO-DMT, which James Oroc, author of Tryptamine Palace, suggests operates within the full bloom of the 7th chakra, the Sahasrara.  Thanx in advance, folks.   _/|\_ _/|\_ 
Good evening All.

I had noticed that the spiritual forum here was a long silent platform, some weeks ago now, and just wanted to playfully bring light to a new topic.  The most recent thread was so deep, it's hardly a surprise for the thoughtful pause.   _/|\_

I have still yet to imbibe of the "God Molecule".  I almost feel impatient...  but I have learned the wisdom of patience.  I am essentially an optimistic mystic.  This dream of life has taught me that the right medicine arrives at the perfect time.  Not sooner or later than what is ordained by one's own unique destiny. So pardon my inspired thoughts here in, for my heart's intention is born of a deep humility, one blessed by this universal harmony we call life and living it to the fullest.   8)

Sure, the nondual state cannot be subjectively interpreted and reinterpreted via reasoning, deduction or dualistic quantification...  but from this side of the looking glass, there is much of great value to share with one another.  The infinite field transcends description or limitation to relative phenomena, as such a ineffible state of being hasn't any boundary or the minutest iota of division nor differentiation. Thus, no lofty words nor any conceptual paradigmn fully encapsulates what forevermore evades our most sincere contemplation and our deepest seeking/witnessing.

But there is a very, very fine line between not speaking about...  or enthusiastically speaking about, what cannot truly be compressed into any fractured, dichotimous paradigmn.  Unity dissolves subjectivity.  Still, just prior to and immediately post interphase with the nondual field of existential being and immediately post said interphase, there is much to learn and process into one's own soul quintessence.  The inside and the outside are revealed to be the same energy & inertia.  The eternal balance.  The universal harmony.    ;)

That being said, does anyone care to relate their own journeys into the infinitum of the immeasurable, clear light of the Void?  Please do, good people, brave travelers.  Much love and respect, my most honored fellows.
High there guys & gals,

I wanted to ask you all to please describe something of the profound experiences born of imbibing the sacred "God Molecule", 5-MeO-DMT, and how it's tremendous effect has taken the willing participant way beyond what one had previously believed was possible.  What can one say about the comparisons and contrasts between 5-MeO-DMT and NN-DMT?  I understand that the visuals and sonics are each most unique to both molecules, on their own terms and have transmitted shifts in conscious-awareness which, in their own right are good medicine (so to speak).

Hello people.

I just joined tonight and wanted some positive feedback about the tremendous potential for this Sacred molecule to facilitate a portal of sorts, a self-shattering transcendence of one's ordinary identity, in preference of the limitlessness of our interphase with the blinding light of the ineffable, sheer emptiness of the eternal void.  Formless, yet, Supreme. 

While I have yet to experience this Sacred molecule, I am eager to learn, to explore and to grow as a soul.  Most of my journeys have been with LSD, psilocybin, mescaline, Salvia Divinorum and most significantly, NN-DMT.  I await the grace of a new teacher.   8)

Namaste and Namaskar to each and all of you, RS