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« on: June 05, 2019, 09:26:45 AM »
Thanks Curador.
My friend who has embraced his role as Shaman, and who had been insisting for me to try the Toad. Has this place really close to Puerto Vallarta, where they do ritual type ceremonies as the ones you have seen the videos. Usually those ceremonies start with a sweat lodge therapy "temazcal" then snuff "rape" to ground the energy of the people while each one waits for their turn. Then everything is followed by an integration session.
My friend knew that i would have told him that i had no time for all of that. So i preferred to go and do it with him alone. This is a quick summary.
1st. Saturday morning 8:00 am - about 15 mg - natural form bufo, smoked - with amazing music by craig pruess as background, on a cool beautiful morning. almost on the verge of breaking through. felt that i was on the gates of an hindu goddess realm, but my conciousness was present trying to hold on. i don´t know if ive let go at any moment. . exhilarating experience. amazing positive energy that acompanied me for a few days, i had en empty stomach and had drinked three glases of wine the day before, so i had some mild nausea during the 25 minutes after effects...
2nd. Another Saturday Morning- 45 days aprox from the 1st. 8:00 am. The Shaman was joined by someone else grandpa like person. again smoked. but probably around 30 mg. i hard to tell. I just remember everything dissolving and turning into fractals as i pulled from the glass pipe. they tell me my body contorted as breakdancing for 20 minutes and then i woke up, with the flow of energy opening my column, thorax, throat, etc.. reborn, no music accompanied me, just the chill vibes from that grandpa an the shaman. the energy was stupid, felt like i had 10 people riffing guitars on my head, and i opened up with everybody about the toad. this time i had some green juice in me and felt perfectly, just really emotional.
3rd. Again, 1 month apart, same setting as before, around 45 mg. amazing psychedelic journey that i felt it was the rapture. my body shouted "wakeee up!" and cried for the earth for some minutes.. For me this is the experience that defines the toad, the journey was amazing..
4th. i convinced a friend. now there were more people at the place. at least 4 more than were preparing for a whole ceremony that would happen 1 hour later. we had a mini ceremony as i had a friend with me, led by the shaman´s wife or SO. my mood was not great as i did not want snuff but was told that it was part of the rite this time to ground or head, etc... don´t like it. so when it was my turn, i think the dosage was around 30 mg. it seemed more, but it was really thin. i felt a lot of angst in the experience.. people were singing chants, etc. drums, giving a lot of color to the experience. needed to wake up and ask for quietness and hugged somenone to drop my angst and did it a second time. where i was trying myself to reroute the energy from angst to something more male and primal, ended up with a lot of dirt in my hands as if i was clawing up the grass and biting. still amazining
5th. Month and a week later. a friday morning at 7:00 am. Just me and the shaman. Beautiful morning with morning dew. it had rained the nght before, so i was worried about getting muddy, and had my head on the weirdness of a DMT experience that i just had tried without breaking through and without learning anything just with a sore throat.
i dont know if it was 30 or how much more. didnt care for that. just needed to ask some questions to myself. and get back on track after having a few hard weeks in work, with a lot of commitments, travel, etc. that were grinding my desire for a healthier life. Really similar to my third experience.
I´d like my close friends and my wife to try it. but they see it too hardcore, even if they recognize an effort on my side to be better. I don´t insist on anyone, only on a few friends who i know are living on a loop.. and to my wife i´m grateful on her understanding.
For me its hard to measure the importance of the shaman on the experience.. for me it has worked really well. i´m thankful that he invited and he has a few sound toold that help you in the process as the experience is easily painted on by external stimuli. So it´s good to be in good hands.