Alone

[lonelyCloud]

My journey reached a climax this morning.
I got it.
It just is.
It is fantastically simple That is the miracle of creation.
I have spent over 7 years getting to today. Through some difficult challenges. I have read, researched, prepared, and meditated. I have used all the other substances. I accept and love myself.
Today was my first full 5 meo, experience. I have had a few beautiful low doses, of handshake experiences, I have done it with a guide who introduced me to the substance, but today it was me alone in the forest. Me in nature, alone. When I did it with a guide he told me I was a natural, and it felt very natural to me. I have seen the videos and read the reports on the dangers of this substance, and I perhaps somewhat arrogantly or recklessly decided that the dangers did not apply to me.
It is impossible for me to describe the intensity and the beauty of the experience I had this morning, It is alarming even how quickly it appears to be fading from my memory.
I have been trying to find people similar to myself to connect with, but it is not easy.
I am a married man in his 50s with young adult kids. Psychedelics seem to be made for me. In my 7 years, on multiple substances. I have not had an experience, that has not been beautiful and valuable. My life has improved in all aspects. I am healthier, happier, I am less stressed. I love life. I have found some people who are on the path I am but I do not know whether it is due to my lucky biology, or my outlook but I seem to be blessed in many respects.
What sets me apart from others I have met on the way:I always have very positive experiences, others I have met seem to have milder or more negative experiences.

• I do not have any significant underlying traumas that I am aware of. I am not trying to heal anything.

• I do have a wonderful time on these substances but I treat them with respect and am not frivolous.

• I am brave - (reckless?), I am ready to try to explore further into my psyche and the nature of reality and existence.

• How do I go back to my mediocre job during the week, when I have been god on the Weekends? "Before enlightenment; chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment; chop wood, carry water.”
  I know that it is unlikely to succeed but I am looking to form a real-world relationship with others with who I could share my experiences with.
  Resonate is a nice word, it gels nicely with the vibration one feels from 5-meo. Does this resonate with you?
  I live in Israel

[yeshua]

thank you for sharing your experiences.  I hope to find as much as you have in my journey here as well.

[Handshake]

Welcome!

Sometimes we have to change our mediocre job as part of integration, or be part of systemic change!
For me, that has been a helpful thing to consider when it feels like there is a big separation between the god-like realms of perfection and daily life.

P.S. Post your experience/trip reports in the appropriate section:
Here for toad secretion experiences: https://forums.5meodmt.org/index.php?board=5.0
Here for synthetic experiences: https://forums.5meodmt.org/index.php?board=4.0
Here for integration discussions: https://forums.5meodmt.org/index.php?board=9.0