the Dhammapada:
Chapter VII: the Venerable (Arhat)
94. The gods even envy him whose senses, like horses well broken in by the driver, have been subdued, who is free from pride, and free from appetites.
It is probably not possible to be without pride entirely, and there is at least a chance that the nervous system needs the slightest amount of pride to function correctly.
This quote connects control of the senses, and lack of "appetites" (desire), to the transcendence of pride. Possibly the original language before transcribed over hundreds of years without a printing press contains the meaning of minimizing pride.
This paper links dopamine to extroverted personality, and drugs like heroin and cocaine/meth subjectively seem to me to fill the users with pride, and most classic psychedelics, which primarily agonize serotonin but secondarily agonize dopamine, seem to have induced in me mainly an increase in love but secondarily a significant increase in pride.
This paper links serotonin to spiritual feelings (a type of love).
It is well known that antipsychotics usually primarily inhibit serotonin and/or dopamine. 5-htp (which is the precursor of serotonin, increases serotonin levels, but taken without l-dopa, the precursor to dopamine, also decreases dopamine levels) has seemingly been shown in at least one case to reduce the frequency of hallucinations. This is evidence, not proof, that increasing serotonin levels simultaneous to decreasing dopamine levels can reduce or eliminate hallucinations even if serotonin levels are significant.
It is suspected that serotonin and dopamine are the primary causes in inducing hallucinations: a source. I have also seen mentioned here that glutamate imbalance, another theory of schizophrenia, increases the brain's supply of dopamine.
Much of the history of mysticism is about the transcendence of desire. Ancient mystics seemed to swim in psychedelic quantities of love, often from meditation or prayer, without experiencing hallucinations and delusions.
In this paper, low serotonin levels are connected to premature ejaculations because desire cannot be staved off. The same paper connects dopamine as a if not the primary cause of the onset of sexual desire. If serotonin helps one resist desire, it stands to reason that elevated serotonin levels on psychedelic drugs could result in a spiritually uplifting sexual experience, wherein orgasm does not occur until many hours have passed. The kind of sexual tantra popularized in the West (to the disappointment of many of the adepts of the non sexual aspects of the various tantric traditions - in as far as they would prefer more attention be focused on those non sexual aspects) has even been linked by psychedelic drug users like Robert Anton Wilson to psychedelic usage, in spite of that many users claim to have too little desire while intoxicated on hallucinogens to experiment.
Pain killers possess a component of tranquilization and stimulation, and "speed" (cocaine, methamphetamine, ect) stimulation without tranquilization. I believe this stimulation is caused by the impulsive nature of pride, that the drug augments pride so much the nervous system cannot help but move at a particular speed. I suspect that love is without an instinctive nature until it interacts with other emotional and/or neurotransmitter systems, providing it a creative capacity to move in any direction. When high levels of love/creativity interact with high levels of pride/impulsiveness, I suspect impulsive creative inferences tend to occur in the form of delusions and hallucinations.
The basic idea that I have is not only that elevated levels of love and serotonin are possible without hallucinations, but also that while pride and dopamine regulate the body off of instinctive drives and instinctive memory retrievals (the most familiar response in similar situations, or the most familiar confident response if fearless - mimicry if no memory of a response has yet been stored), love and serotonin possesses the same control over the nervous system at the level of raw choice.
Although reports vary, some research into placebo suggests that what our nervous system identifies as the truth becomes the truth, even to the extent of healing major ailments and rejecting allergens.
The popular story of the mother who lifts a car to save her child suggests to me that while pride identifies the physical limitations etched in memory, love, in this instance the love of a mother, has the ability to max out the nervous system's resources, so long as there is no time to reflect on the odds of success.
Some of my theory is rooted in personal experience.
Page 151 of Bloodline of the Holy Grail: the Hidden Lineage of Jesus Revealed by Laurence Gardner connects the Bors lineage to the mythic Merovingian bloodline of Christ. My mother's maiden name is Bowers, which is rooted in the German Bauer lineage (also the root bloodline of the Rothschildes). This could be a coincidence, but my brain chemistry seems peculiar to me, yet typical of the Bowers side of my family.
During the elementary school years, I was diagnosed with ADD, which is considered rooted in a dopamine deficiency. I was prescribed a stimulant, and didn't feel any effects while on it. A relative on the Bowers side of the family told me that when she was prescribed ADD meds (a stimulant, again), she thought it was supposed to make her sleepy, and that she didn't experience any increase in energy.
I quote a Bowers ancestor who used cocaine, "Cocaine is not a stimulant." I myself smoked crack laced weed and it seemed like regular weed to me, but my friends were acting as if they were extremely addicted. If you inhaled it slowly, it tasted sort of like plastic.
Pain killers, such as hospital prescribed morphine injections for a broken leg, just made me slightly or extremely sleepy, and had no narcotic effect. However, street obtained hydrocodone or oxycodone, even at far lower dosages than the morphine, while of very little effect by themselves, became a narcotic when I combined them with pot. A potent enough narcotic that I was obviously on something fairly strong besides the pot itself.
On strong hallucinogenics, I would experience the profoundest love based high, such that in those days I thought it made no sense it was possible the human brain could sustain it. For a basis of comparison, alcohol was about 50 times better than sober, weed several hundred times better than sober, DXM thousands of times better than sober, and my first couple times on acid and mushrooms made DXM seem like smoking a cigarette. I took three tabs of LSD my first "trip", over half a ten strip my second "trip", and usually when I did mushrooms I took the equivalent of about 6 grams.
I never experienced any hallucinations on any of the drugs I took, with the exception of visual distortions on alcohol, dxm, and various depressants. No colors or trails or anything, just inhibited depth perception and falling in and out of near-sleep.
Since the LSD and the mushrooms were obtained from the streets (some of the mushrooms were baked into chocolates, but some actually were just dried mushrooms), I eventually tested my brain chemistry on about 140 or so Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds from a verified source, ground them up into a fine powder and swallowed with an energy drink. The feeling was the same, just far, far less potent than what I was used to, but still better than DXM. And still no hallucinations.
I am deeply interested in 5-meo-DMT, but the closest I have come to it is a verifiable batch of low potency ayahuasca. It felt similar to LSD, shrooms, or LSA, but far weaker because it was such a low dose I almost didn't obtain lift-off at all. It felt somehow mellower.
I smoked cigarettes on and off from ages 12 to about age 20, and never got addicted. I never felt the slightest craving if I didn't have one, and smoked them because of peer pressure and a mild but pleasant light headed feeling that eventually went away - so I permanently quit.
I suspect that if Bors means Bowers and I am indeed a Merovingian, a bloodline tradition of mysticism has shrunken my dopamine receptors because of mysticism's inhibition of pride and transcendence of desire. This could explain the peculiar way in which my brain chemistry reacted to drugs.
In addition to hallucinogenic drug usage and pot smoking, I was regularly self programming with a system of initiation I invented. During one of the initiation ceremonies, I lost almost all of my pride and learned to love in an attachment free manner. I had no attachments, and beauty became completely subjective.
The initiation was performed on some variety of purple dank weed. The high, from nearly 20 years ago, lasted to this day, because my heart would not stop expanding.
Shortly after this initiation, I meditated on stilling the mind, and impulsive thoughts permanently left me.
Experiment has proven to me I can generate any emotion I want by focusing and making the attempt, and I can even manifest an attraction for anyone I want - but I have no attraction unless I willfully generate one.
Situational triggers cannot impact my perpetual happiness.
Before I awakened to indiscriminate love, I cried for days if a pet gerbil passed away. After, I would not shed a tear even if my favorite relatives died.
I can also speed up or slow down the energy level of my mind or body at will. To some extent, the average person does this when rushing to get things done - but I believe this can be carried extremely far if you do not identify a particular limit.
Ram Dass Gives Maharaji the "Yogi Medicine" - this is an anecdotal tale wherein hallucinogenics don't work anymore for certain advanced meditators. I suspect this is because mastery of various yogas, perhaps with the assistance of psychedelic drugs like DMT, so elevates one's natural serotonin levels that there is nothing for the psychedelics to do. I am curious what Maharaji would do if he was provided a high dose of 5-meo-dmt instead of LSD-25.
Closing Thoughts
I believe that serotonin and dopamine are linked to love and pride, and that love and pride interact to induce hallucinations - on most kinds of psychedelic drugs, including 5-meo-dmt.
Pride seems to me to be the source of the impulsiveness of hallucinations and delusions, because an impulsive energy. The fuel source of an instinctive complex that impulsively retrieves memories of past experiences to determine how to respond to situations, and cannot help but respond a finite number of ways based on those memories.
One kind of memory retrieved impulsively is the instructions: if the individual responds out of pride to diverse situations wherein hir is perfect of confidence, having witnessed the task performed correctly or it been explained properly, the task is executed perfectly based upon that memory. If there is lack of confidence, the instinctive complex identifies that it is veering to the side of accuracy in reproducing the information in memory, so the task is performed incorrectly.
I have never felt the effects of "speed", but they subjectively seem to me, based on what I have read and observed in users, to drastically augment pride and impulsiveness. I suspect this is because pride is itself impulsive forward momentum, and that dopamine, which speed is well documented to increase, increases or corresponds to increased pride *somehow. Maybe it is pride, maybe they are just linked together.
When I took psychedelics, they usually seemed to increase pride and especially increase love. Since they are known to have an affinity for dopamine, but a far higher affinity for serotonin, I suspect that serotonin may be linked to feelings of love - and there is scientific research that backs this suspicion.
My quest for spiritual enlightenment, my exploration of various drugs and consciousness expansion techniques, and my intuition into past scientific research, indicates to me that love is non-impulsive, but otherwise runs the nervous system similarly to pride. Instead of instinctive memory retrieval, there is choice and creativity. Choice because there is no instinct requiring a particular action, and creativity because of that but also because of the lack of a polarity between safety/confidence and fear/unfamiliarity, there is comfort and safety in exploring new territory.
Since if impacted love can move in any direction, if pride impacts love, as well as the emotional instinctive complex it fuels, it is likely to be creatively magnified. An inference occurs in the direction pride impacts love,
And that inference could be a hallucination or a delusion.
In the case of mystical experiences, perhaps it feels inherently mystical to be uplifted by overwhelming quantities of love, and so impulsive mystical inferences are magnified and manifested creatively - as hallucinations.
The most interesting thing to me is what would result if there were only creativity and little to no instinctiveness. Both serotonin and dopamine are inhibited to minimize the frequency of hallucinations. And 5-htp in at least one case study was administered successfully to treat hallucinations, even although it increases serotonin levels (while decreasing dopamine levels).
To be 100% in control of the creativity could induce a very high quality state of self determinism, and you would be in control of whether or not you experienced visions/imaginary sensory data. You could probably retrieve "spiritual insights from the cosmos" at will (the 8th circuit of Leary's model).
There may be something about psychedelic drugs that makes the average person hallucinate no matter what. Perhaps they directly interact with the dopamine system, or maybe something else is happening. I would never advise meditating on releasing pride while going up on psychedelics to resist hallucinations, because the level of self control required is probably rare and it is plausible the drug physically amplifies dopamine and pride levels regardless of one's self mastery.
If psychic powers were real, and psychic shroomers travelled together, it could be possible to hold down the pride of one's recognizance partner as a trip sitter.
But in the real world, where psychics and superpowered yogis likely don't exist, maybe it is enough to meditate when sober on generating love, on having an open heart, and on minimizing pride.
I consider it possible to be "high all the time" on psychedelic quantities of serotonin without experiencing HPPD, without hallucinations or delusions - existing in a state of focus that is even superior to sobriety, & would like to promote underground research, where legal, into how to obtain the yogi Maharaji's immunity to "the yogi medicine".
Chapter VII: the Venerable (Arhat)
94. The gods even envy him whose senses, like horses well broken in by the driver, have been subdued, who is free from pride, and free from appetites.
It is probably not possible to be without pride entirely, and there is at least a chance that the nervous system needs the slightest amount of pride to function correctly.
This quote connects control of the senses, and lack of "appetites" (desire), to the transcendence of pride. Possibly the original language before transcribed over hundreds of years without a printing press contains the meaning of minimizing pride.
This paper links dopamine to extroverted personality, and drugs like heroin and cocaine/meth subjectively seem to me to fill the users with pride, and most classic psychedelics, which primarily agonize serotonin but secondarily agonize dopamine, seem to have induced in me mainly an increase in love but secondarily a significant increase in pride.
This paper links serotonin to spiritual feelings (a type of love).
It is well known that antipsychotics usually primarily inhibit serotonin and/or dopamine. 5-htp (which is the precursor of serotonin, increases serotonin levels, but taken without l-dopa, the precursor to dopamine, also decreases dopamine levels) has seemingly been shown in at least one case to reduce the frequency of hallucinations. This is evidence, not proof, that increasing serotonin levels simultaneous to decreasing dopamine levels can reduce or eliminate hallucinations even if serotonin levels are significant.
It is suspected that serotonin and dopamine are the primary causes in inducing hallucinations: a source. I have also seen mentioned here that glutamate imbalance, another theory of schizophrenia, increases the brain's supply of dopamine.
Much of the history of mysticism is about the transcendence of desire. Ancient mystics seemed to swim in psychedelic quantities of love, often from meditation or prayer, without experiencing hallucinations and delusions.
In this paper, low serotonin levels are connected to premature ejaculations because desire cannot be staved off. The same paper connects dopamine as a if not the primary cause of the onset of sexual desire. If serotonin helps one resist desire, it stands to reason that elevated serotonin levels on psychedelic drugs could result in a spiritually uplifting sexual experience, wherein orgasm does not occur until many hours have passed. The kind of sexual tantra popularized in the West (to the disappointment of many of the adepts of the non sexual aspects of the various tantric traditions - in as far as they would prefer more attention be focused on those non sexual aspects) has even been linked by psychedelic drug users like Robert Anton Wilson to psychedelic usage, in spite of that many users claim to have too little desire while intoxicated on hallucinogens to experiment.
Pain killers possess a component of tranquilization and stimulation, and "speed" (cocaine, methamphetamine, ect) stimulation without tranquilization. I believe this stimulation is caused by the impulsive nature of pride, that the drug augments pride so much the nervous system cannot help but move at a particular speed. I suspect that love is without an instinctive nature until it interacts with other emotional and/or neurotransmitter systems, providing it a creative capacity to move in any direction. When high levels of love/creativity interact with high levels of pride/impulsiveness, I suspect impulsive creative inferences tend to occur in the form of delusions and hallucinations.
The basic idea that I have is not only that elevated levels of love and serotonin are possible without hallucinations, but also that while pride and dopamine regulate the body off of instinctive drives and instinctive memory retrievals (the most familiar response in similar situations, or the most familiar confident response if fearless - mimicry if no memory of a response has yet been stored), love and serotonin possesses the same control over the nervous system at the level of raw choice.
Although reports vary, some research into placebo suggests that what our nervous system identifies as the truth becomes the truth, even to the extent of healing major ailments and rejecting allergens.
The popular story of the mother who lifts a car to save her child suggests to me that while pride identifies the physical limitations etched in memory, love, in this instance the love of a mother, has the ability to max out the nervous system's resources, so long as there is no time to reflect on the odds of success.
Some of my theory is rooted in personal experience.
Page 151 of Bloodline of the Holy Grail: the Hidden Lineage of Jesus Revealed by Laurence Gardner connects the Bors lineage to the mythic Merovingian bloodline of Christ. My mother's maiden name is Bowers, which is rooted in the German Bauer lineage (also the root bloodline of the Rothschildes). This could be a coincidence, but my brain chemistry seems peculiar to me, yet typical of the Bowers side of my family.
During the elementary school years, I was diagnosed with ADD, which is considered rooted in a dopamine deficiency. I was prescribed a stimulant, and didn't feel any effects while on it. A relative on the Bowers side of the family told me that when she was prescribed ADD meds (a stimulant, again), she thought it was supposed to make her sleepy, and that she didn't experience any increase in energy.
I quote a Bowers ancestor who used cocaine, "Cocaine is not a stimulant." I myself smoked crack laced weed and it seemed like regular weed to me, but my friends were acting as if they were extremely addicted. If you inhaled it slowly, it tasted sort of like plastic.
Pain killers, such as hospital prescribed morphine injections for a broken leg, just made me slightly or extremely sleepy, and had no narcotic effect. However, street obtained hydrocodone or oxycodone, even at far lower dosages than the morphine, while of very little effect by themselves, became a narcotic when I combined them with pot. A potent enough narcotic that I was obviously on something fairly strong besides the pot itself.
On strong hallucinogenics, I would experience the profoundest love based high, such that in those days I thought it made no sense it was possible the human brain could sustain it. For a basis of comparison, alcohol was about 50 times better than sober, weed several hundred times better than sober, DXM thousands of times better than sober, and my first couple times on acid and mushrooms made DXM seem like smoking a cigarette. I took three tabs of LSD my first "trip", over half a ten strip my second "trip", and usually when I did mushrooms I took the equivalent of about 6 grams.
I never experienced any hallucinations on any of the drugs I took, with the exception of visual distortions on alcohol, dxm, and various depressants. No colors or trails or anything, just inhibited depth perception and falling in and out of near-sleep.
Since the LSD and the mushrooms were obtained from the streets (some of the mushrooms were baked into chocolates, but some actually were just dried mushrooms), I eventually tested my brain chemistry on about 140 or so Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds from a verified source, ground them up into a fine powder and swallowed with an energy drink. The feeling was the same, just far, far less potent than what I was used to, but still better than DXM. And still no hallucinations.
I am deeply interested in 5-meo-DMT, but the closest I have come to it is a verifiable batch of low potency ayahuasca. It felt similar to LSD, shrooms, or LSA, but far weaker because it was such a low dose I almost didn't obtain lift-off at all. It felt somehow mellower.
I smoked cigarettes on and off from ages 12 to about age 20, and never got addicted. I never felt the slightest craving if I didn't have one, and smoked them because of peer pressure and a mild but pleasant light headed feeling that eventually went away - so I permanently quit.
I suspect that if Bors means Bowers and I am indeed a Merovingian, a bloodline tradition of mysticism has shrunken my dopamine receptors because of mysticism's inhibition of pride and transcendence of desire. This could explain the peculiar way in which my brain chemistry reacted to drugs.
In addition to hallucinogenic drug usage and pot smoking, I was regularly self programming with a system of initiation I invented. During one of the initiation ceremonies, I lost almost all of my pride and learned to love in an attachment free manner. I had no attachments, and beauty became completely subjective.
The initiation was performed on some variety of purple dank weed. The high, from nearly 20 years ago, lasted to this day, because my heart would not stop expanding.
Shortly after this initiation, I meditated on stilling the mind, and impulsive thoughts permanently left me.
Experiment has proven to me I can generate any emotion I want by focusing and making the attempt, and I can even manifest an attraction for anyone I want - but I have no attraction unless I willfully generate one.
Situational triggers cannot impact my perpetual happiness.
Before I awakened to indiscriminate love, I cried for days if a pet gerbil passed away. After, I would not shed a tear even if my favorite relatives died.
I can also speed up or slow down the energy level of my mind or body at will. To some extent, the average person does this when rushing to get things done - but I believe this can be carried extremely far if you do not identify a particular limit.
Ram Dass Gives Maharaji the "Yogi Medicine" - this is an anecdotal tale wherein hallucinogenics don't work anymore for certain advanced meditators. I suspect this is because mastery of various yogas, perhaps with the assistance of psychedelic drugs like DMT, so elevates one's natural serotonin levels that there is nothing for the psychedelics to do. I am curious what Maharaji would do if he was provided a high dose of 5-meo-dmt instead of LSD-25.
Closing Thoughts
I believe that serotonin and dopamine are linked to love and pride, and that love and pride interact to induce hallucinations - on most kinds of psychedelic drugs, including 5-meo-dmt.
Pride seems to me to be the source of the impulsiveness of hallucinations and delusions, because an impulsive energy. The fuel source of an instinctive complex that impulsively retrieves memories of past experiences to determine how to respond to situations, and cannot help but respond a finite number of ways based on those memories.
One kind of memory retrieved impulsively is the instructions: if the individual responds out of pride to diverse situations wherein hir is perfect of confidence, having witnessed the task performed correctly or it been explained properly, the task is executed perfectly based upon that memory. If there is lack of confidence, the instinctive complex identifies that it is veering to the side of accuracy in reproducing the information in memory, so the task is performed incorrectly.
I have never felt the effects of "speed", but they subjectively seem to me, based on what I have read and observed in users, to drastically augment pride and impulsiveness. I suspect this is because pride is itself impulsive forward momentum, and that dopamine, which speed is well documented to increase, increases or corresponds to increased pride *somehow. Maybe it is pride, maybe they are just linked together.
When I took psychedelics, they usually seemed to increase pride and especially increase love. Since they are known to have an affinity for dopamine, but a far higher affinity for serotonin, I suspect that serotonin may be linked to feelings of love - and there is scientific research that backs this suspicion.
My quest for spiritual enlightenment, my exploration of various drugs and consciousness expansion techniques, and my intuition into past scientific research, indicates to me that love is non-impulsive, but otherwise runs the nervous system similarly to pride. Instead of instinctive memory retrieval, there is choice and creativity. Choice because there is no instinct requiring a particular action, and creativity because of that but also because of the lack of a polarity between safety/confidence and fear/unfamiliarity, there is comfort and safety in exploring new territory.
Since if impacted love can move in any direction, if pride impacts love, as well as the emotional instinctive complex it fuels, it is likely to be creatively magnified. An inference occurs in the direction pride impacts love,
And that inference could be a hallucination or a delusion.
In the case of mystical experiences, perhaps it feels inherently mystical to be uplifted by overwhelming quantities of love, and so impulsive mystical inferences are magnified and manifested creatively - as hallucinations.
The most interesting thing to me is what would result if there were only creativity and little to no instinctiveness. Both serotonin and dopamine are inhibited to minimize the frequency of hallucinations. And 5-htp in at least one case study was administered successfully to treat hallucinations, even although it increases serotonin levels (while decreasing dopamine levels).
To be 100% in control of the creativity could induce a very high quality state of self determinism, and you would be in control of whether or not you experienced visions/imaginary sensory data. You could probably retrieve "spiritual insights from the cosmos" at will (the 8th circuit of Leary's model).
There may be something about psychedelic drugs that makes the average person hallucinate no matter what. Perhaps they directly interact with the dopamine system, or maybe something else is happening. I would never advise meditating on releasing pride while going up on psychedelics to resist hallucinations, because the level of self control required is probably rare and it is plausible the drug physically amplifies dopamine and pride levels regardless of one's self mastery.
If psychic powers were real, and psychic shroomers travelled together, it could be possible to hold down the pride of one's recognizance partner as a trip sitter.
But in the real world, where psychics and superpowered yogis likely don't exist, maybe it is enough to meditate when sober on generating love, on having an open heart, and on minimizing pride.
I consider it possible to be "high all the time" on psychedelic quantities of serotonin without experiencing HPPD, without hallucinations or delusions - existing in a state of focus that is even superior to sobriety, & would like to promote underground research, where legal, into how to obtain the yogi Maharaji's immunity to "the yogi medicine".