Author Topic: 2 times with 5  (Read 670 times)

Offline Winston Smith

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2 times with 5
« on: November 12, 2017, 09:37:02 PM »
Typing soundtrack : Four Tet ' New Energy'

20 yrs ago, age 26, I had a non-dual epiphany, from LSD and shaktipat (thanks Elaine!) it was the 90's and drugs where an every weekend kind of thing. Since then my awareness has included the energy body 24/7. No off switch it seems, the sensations I feel have been variously – dense flow, light sparkle,warm tingle, intense pressure and a hard block at the center of the head, always shifting. I see geometric patterns that sometimes resolve into a point of bright crystal like energy. 
I have perused a career in healing- I work as an Acupuncturist as a result of this experience, my whole adult life has been shaped by the search for an understanding of what is happening, if this is energy is real, and a medicine that would help shift this intense block at the center of my being, and help allow the flow of energy to resolve.
 I tried everything it seemed, from Qi Gong to Ayahuasca x 6, Salvia x 4, DMT x 1, LSD x 2, Mushrooms x 10 ,pot - daily(very helpful and gives me a non dual experience most times). I went on a 5 day, 10 day and finally 14 day retreat, but the sensations always came back. I have studied Tibetan Buddhism , arriving at the non-dual Mahamudra teachings, but never quiet getting 'the view' it seemed., and not much mention of this energy body I was experiencing.
 The search continued until i came across the non-dual teachings of Rupert Spira and James Swartz. The first is a modern direct path instructor,no sanskrit or any religiosity,very clear and direct,  the 2nd is a more traditional Advaita Vedanta teacher. More recently I've been digging Martin Ball's 'Radical Non Duality" take as it is totally immersed in this medicine. They all rock my world ,and have done a lot to prepare me for the shift that is now unfurling.
I've done 5 on two occasions- first time a few months ago, the second a few weeks after that. Both times smoked about 15mg a hit of salt from a lab – 3 times the first night, twice the second.  It was on the second hit of the first night that it happened, The smoothest most gorgeously intense sensation, no rough edges, totally wonderful to let go into, no fear, the question spontaneously arising ' Who am I ?" Beautiful patterns swirling, opening up into emptiness, emerging into a non-dual, complete, whole ,actionless , awareness, nothing is outside of 'this' , I am 'this' and so all appearances can be included, nothing rejected as being too painful or horrible to deal with, everything loved, because I am love, no not quite correct, there's no 'I' , just 'this' ,just love!
My day to day reality is becoming better and better , increased practice of energy work, yoga and qi gong, studying my teachers texts. The block is still present, but softening, i can always dissolve any blocks that come up, shifting under the light of knowledge/awareness,  bringing forth Insights into the appearance of form, how to work with it and heal myself, and others. And LOVE lots of heart glowing, life affirming love !
« Last Edit: November 12, 2017, 10:41:00 PM by Winston Smith »

Offline HumbleVoyager

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Re: 2 times with 5
« Reply #1 on: November 15, 2017, 07:31:33 AM »
Welcome to the forums and thank you for this beautiful introduction of your path! We look forward to your contributions here.  :))

Offline Flux

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Re: 2 times with 5
« Reply #2 on: November 22, 2017, 12:05:58 AM »
Welcome Winston Smith,

Thank for sharing the about your experiences thus far. This medicine (of all the entheogens) to me seems to be the most attuned to healing and aligning the energetic body...look forward to what you have to offer the community here.