Author Topic: New here and excited  (Read 153 times)

Offline innerspacer

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New here and excited
« on: January 01, 2020, 07:36:33 PM »
Hello,
   I have had a mystical inclination and lively imagination and longing for the mystical ever since a child. I have had a love of things psychedelic and shamanism since about 12 years of age although it has not been a straight path or somethng I have totally immersed myself in.At 17 I dropped my first LSD and at 20 I read Kapleaus Three pillars of zen and dropped LSD again and those truths in Kapleau about zen seemed so obvious in theory lol. I also had an interest in yoga and went to India although I was not ready for yogic or monastic discpline and still to this day more than 20 years later I remain pretty much a novice. I have done Hoffman many times throughout my years and quite often smaller doses that has helped with mood and sometimes higher doses.
   I have also done some tryptamines and mushrooms and some more obscure ones too. About 15 years ago I did 5meo-dmt once and I remember it was short and I felt good but dont remember much more.   The last couple of years I have had great struggles in life even with basic needs such as housing and monetary issues and work and I have also faced total exhaustion and stress. I have taken some smaller doses of LSD analogues ALD-52 and 1cp-LSD that helps at the moment to be positive and get a distance. After recommendation I also tried Ketamine. It helped very temporary against depression but I felt it was not uplifting like other psychedelics.  I also exeperimented with n,n DMT recently which was very interesting. Using a dab pen I was able to make breakthroughs easily in one single inhalation and had 5 breakthroughs with 30-  50 mg. At first there  were those crazy moving patterns and then I was thrown into another place where beings communicated with me. My memory is vague however and after reading many accounts of DMT I realize very few describe much clear and useful information. It is an amazing realm and I am curious but I do think it is beyond human comprehension and I think it might also be risky to go there. But I dont know much about anything.I havent gotten it yet but 5meo-dmt is on my next shamanic list and I am looking forward to be here and read as well. I only  just read a few posts here but already I sense that people here ave reached more understanding then people who uses n,n DMT do. That is just what I think and what do I know in the gran scale of things?Greetings and blessings to all <3 _/|\_

Offline HumbleVoyager

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Re: New here and excited
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2020, 03:11:51 PM »
Welcome! We look forward to your contributions here.

Offline innerspacer

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Re: New here and excited
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2020, 10:17:32 PM »
Thank you for reply humble voyager!
    I realize it is not recommended but I don`t have any social schamanic contact in my town. That is actually quite a trauma of mine I was forced to move from the country where I lived and a job I loved and ended up moving 7 times thorugh 4 countries with my family and ending up barely finding minimum income and in small inland town where I never been before because I could barely find a place to rent in Sweden partly due to extreme immigration 100000 people a year in a country with 9.5 million population.
   Living at or below poverty level not traveling anywhere my schamanic interest started growing out of desperation. I had it as a child and young teenager but this time it has been out of therapeutic need as well. Some of the new lyseragmide analogues have been very good the latest 1cp l s d is very pure and smoother than l s d 25 and it has given me some positive outlook although I dont take higher doses because they are long lasting and even a bit physical straining especially when being physically and mentally exhausted. Anyway nn DMt didnt feel relevant to me and didn´t give me much insight although it was smooth for me and I didnt freak out or anything. The vaporization and lying down surrendering to the experience went just fine. I know it is not recommended but I am planning to do 5meo alone.
   I don´t have any social schamanic contact in this town and for many years it has felt like a curse of being alone and being far away from peers of similar interest. And loving nice weather and even getting joint aches etc I am now forced to live in Northern Sweden where winter pretty much lasts 6 months. Anyhow I have a digital scale and I will tread lightly and try not to scream or freak out like I have seen some people do. I know there is the occuring of reactivations and surely I have much negativity to cleanse but probably I can handle it, I will findout. I have been reading some buddhist and yogic scripture for many years although I have learned little but they all talk about the unity of all things. I lost my whole yogic library somewhere along my moves around the world but just rebought Yogandandas God talks to Arjuna a beautiful commentary on the Bhagavad Gita that is a great scripture about the all the basic existential issues of being a human being. I happened to open it randomly and got a verse that said something like: He who can remain unaffected in difficult circumstances and remain non attached to pleasurable ciscumstances will reach a high state.. dont remember the exact wording. And it does sound so true and easy to read but oh so difficult to practice.